In writing Thriving in Sex Work: Sex Work and Money, I read dozens of personal finance books. This blog series consists of reviews of books I think sex workers could benefit from. I’m aware, however, that nearly all personal finance books aren’t geared towards the specific issues sex workers face. So I’ve done my best to provide a down-and-dirty roadmap of what to expect— the good and the bad, and why I think any particular book might be useful to you.

To Buy or Not To Buy: Why We Overshop and How To Stop by Dr. April Lane Benson

I recommend this book to: Anyone who struggles with shopping for stuff you don’t need or can’t afford.

Because: As Benson writes: “Like the Maltese falcon in the Bogart movie, it’s the stuff that dreams are made of. And ‘stuff,’ the material things we buy with money, can have profound emotional significance, becoming inextricably linked with happiness, love, power, freedom, security, independence, control, and self-worth.”

Action Verbs: Overspending, shopping, paying off debt

Key Takeaways: We confuse love, happiness, power, status, security, independence, and self-love with shopping and owning. We can never achieve emotional fullfilment from acquiring stuff we don’t really need. 

Heartfelt to Practical Ratio: 1:1

Strengths: Warm and well written. Drills straight down to the emotional core of overspending in the first half, with dynamite practical help in the second half.

Trigger warnings: Benson says herself that men are just as likely to overspend as women, yet uses she/her pronouns throughout. Her outlook is squarely middle class/upwardly mobile-aspirational, which might not be relatable for everyone.

Learn more at: www.stoppingovershopping.com